Tuesday, September 23, 2014

Don't Grinf*ck Me

You've seen the scenario play itself out a million times before. A client or coworker comes to you for advice; you offer your very best insights. The other person nods, smiles, thanks you, and agrees to put some of your ideas into action. But then you find out, hours or days later, the person not only ignored your advice but went against it.

You've been grinf#(ked.

The Urban Dictionary defines grinf*ck (noun form) as follows.
In business, when someone smiles and shakes your hand, assuring you that they have heard and will act upon your recommendation or concerns, when in truth you have already been ignored and dismissed.
I think the expectation of being grinf#(ked is why many of us are hesitant to take user satisfaction surveys when asked to do so by banks, e-commerce sites, etc. We suspect we'll get the nod, the sincere thank you—and see our suggestions ignored. (Have you ever dialed the 800 number listed under one of those "How is my driving?" stickers on the backs of trucks? Me neither.)

I'm not a psychologist (so if any specialists are reading this, please speak up here), but it seems to me that grinf**kery, in at least some cases, qualifies as a type of passive-aggressive behavior, meant to humble the advice-giver while bolstering the other person's authority. In other cases, grinf**king is just a byproduct of someone's opinion-gathering requirement. The person who asked for your advice was required to get a second or third opinion on something; there was never any intent to use that opinion to deviate from an already chosen agenda.

And then there are those who mean you no disrespect, but who simply feel embarrassed or timid about disagreeing with you to your face. These are well-meaning people who aren't trying to be disingenuous. They just don't like to appear disagreeable. Or maybe they're confrontation-averse.

Regardless of motivations, it seems to me we all have a duty to be honest and forthright in our dealings with clients and coworkers. We can always agree to disagree on things, if need be. There's room (or should be, in any organization) for honest divergence of opinions. Transparent, open debate of ideas is healthy and should be encouraged.

But don't be disingenuous. Don't camouflage dissent as agreement. Don't tell me one thing when you mean another. Don't deliberately mislead me into thinking you value what I'm saying, when in fact you intend to ignore what I'm saying. When I learn the truth, later, it does nothing good for our relationship.

Just be honest with me. Let me know what you really think. I can take it. I promise.

Don't be a grinf#(ker.


  1. HI you have a good blog i like your blog as it have all the good information. for more information Click on kurtis online shopping

  2. Kanker yakni penyakit yg tak pandang bulu waktu menyerang badan manusia. Kenali Gejala-gejala Terkena Kanker Kandung Kemih
    Sakit, nyeri, & masalah kesehatan lain yg tampaknya mungil tidak boleh dianggap sepele. Gejala-gejala Kanker Yang Sering Diabaikan
    Berikut yaitu ciri-ciri penyakit kanker mulut yg butuh kamu waspadai sejak dini. Wasapadai Gejala-Gejala Penyakit Kanker Mulut
    Kanker yakni satu buah penyakit di mana ditemukan sebuah massa atau sel-sel penambahan yg fungsinya tidak sama bersama sel normal. Gejala-gejla Kanker Paru-Paru yang Harus Diwaspadai
    Berikut ini yakni makanan yg baik utk penderita kanker kelenjar getah bening. Makanan Yang Baik Untuk Penderita Kanker Kelenjar Getah Bening

  3. Iridosiklitis akut mata tidak jarang dinamakan bersama ubeitis anterior uveitis atau berjalan di depan mata.Definisi dan Gejala Mata Iridosiklitis Akut
    Mata floaters terutama disebabkan oleh perubahan terkait umur & muncul kala bahan-bahan seperti jelly (vitreous) di mata Kamu jadi lebih likuid.Mengenal Faktor Resiko dan Penyebab Mata Floaters
    Konjungtivitis berjalan lantaran peradangan kebetulan membran yg mencakup bidang depan mata atau konjungtiva.Pengobatan dan Pencegahan terjadinya Konjungtivitis
    Ablasio yakni tipe penyakit mata yg terkait bersama retina sensorik dari yg jaringan jaringan epitel pigmen retina (naik) yg bisa berlangsung kepada seluruhnya type ganda & umur.Cara Penanganan Penyakit Mata Ablasio Retina
    Kanker diperkirakan disebabkan 8,2 juta orang di seluruh dunia. 60% dari kasus kanker ini terjadi di Afrika, Asia, Amerika Tengah dan Amerika Selatan.Deteksi Dini Penyakit Kanker Serviks yang Benar

  4. Obat Herbal Telinga Berdengung Terus Menerus


    Terima kasih semoga bermanfaat dan jangan lupa kunjungi website kami.

  5. The information is interesting and I'm happy to read this article. Thanks for the article
    may be useful
    We are waiting for the latest information

  6. I wouldn't like to be in a position where a person pretends to be very pleased with what i say, only to disregard it later and better still betray me. I find it very important that you shared, many people needs to see this kind of information to be aware of their working partners. Blue Brick Wallpaper Great post

  7. His article is very useful, interesting and easy to read and understand, hopefully useful

    Obat Jelly Gamat QnC
    Obat Ginjal Herbal
    Obat Hipertensi Herbal
    Obat Kanker Rahim Alami Ampuh

  8. The latest information we are waiting for lho..semoga what is given can be useful
    Terimakash..success always everything..salam know ..

    obat tradisional pengapuran tulang manjur
    obat kanker usus tradisional

  9. Great article, very happy to be able to read it and very useful. Thank you very much for the explanation.

    G-Sea Jelly Gamat Emas Rasa Jeruk
    Gama Arafat Gamat Emas Kapsul
    Obat Paru Paru Basah (Pneumonia) Yang Alami & Ampuh

  10. Thank you for the more information great article and very nice links plz visit




  11. Thank you very much for information great article and visit my website: http://www.fooglepackers.com/


  12. News presented on your site is very helpful .. hopefully you can provide other latest info yes
    Success always ..

    obat varikokel ringan tradisional
    obat benjolan belakang telinga herbal

  13. The latest information we are waiting for lho..semoga what is given can be useful
    Terimakash..success always everything..salam know

    obat herbal kelenjar tiroid ampuh
    obat kanker lidah tradisional
    obat kaku leher dan tegang

  14. Information is very useful and can add insight, happy to be on your page, thanks to the information you shared. This is very useful. Good luck always!!
    Cara Mengatasi Kurap Di Kulit Kepala
    Cara Menyembuhkan Kurap Di Kulit Kepala
    Cara Alami Menyembuhkan GERD Dengan Cepat dan Aman

  15. We are always shifting are goods according’s to 1bhk, 2bhk, 3bhk and 4bhk shifting services are provide www.awaypackersmovers.in of entire of a building’s. Packing and moving or car transportation and relocation of motor vehicles to the commercial or factories’ products for hassle expect done shifting services in India. Once the packing is done with almost for the loading is done with immense are done by team of experts while the boxes can be shifting of heavy machinery equipment’s providers solution’s by the folder services managements by moving and packing company. List of packer and mover in India, take at it happens to be persons switch that can intern commonly generally is an excellent for the Away a techniques associated with persons for the needs services in India.
    Away Packers and Movers
    Packers and Movers Bangalore
    Packers and Movers Chennai
    Packers and Movers Delhi
    Packers and Movers Gurgaon
    Packers and Movers Hyderabad
    Packers and Movers Mumbai
    Packers and Movers Pune

  16. This article you share is very helpful to me, I am happy to read this article. If you can fix it again for better. thanks to the information you shared. Good luck always!!
    Obat Benjolan Di Langit Langit Mulut Herbal Terbaik
    Cara Menyembuhkan Gondongan Dengan Obat Herbal Paling Ampuh
    Obat Gagal Ginjal Kronis Herbal terbaik Tanpa Cuci Darah
    Obat Herbal Batu Ginjal Terbukti Paling Ampuh

  17. Congratulations reactivities ,, highly awaited new information from this site
    Good luck !!

    situs herbal
    obat penyakit hipertiroid
    obat kanker hati mujarab

  18. the information you share is very useful
    Highly awaited other latest news

    obat keropos tulang herbal
    obat nyeri bahu herbal

  19. Thanks for the information presented on your website
    Very in waiting for other information

    manfaat temulawak untuk hepatitis
    daun salam untuk sakit pinggang
    obat gendang telinga sakit

  20. Good morning to noon ,, the information is very helpful
    Very waiting for the latest news updates from your site

    bahaya asam lambung saat hamil
    makanan penderita infeksi paru paru
    ciri ciri kista coklat sembuh

  21. wihh nice info, saya pengunjung setia web anda
    kunjung balik, di web kami banyak penawaran dan tips tentang kesehatan
    Ada artikel menarik tentang obat tradisional yang mampu menyembuhkan penyakit berat, cek yuk
    Pengobatan Mikosis

  22. this website is very useful for the world community, not only that the design is also very interesting eyes so that readers want to read it back.
    Manfaat Daun Afrika Untuk Kanker Hati

  23. this is the best page I've ever visited happy to be on your page I found your page from google
    Cara Mengobati Kolesterol
    Cara Mengobati Jantung Koroner

  24. Thanks, the article you created is very interesting and easy to understand

  25. Thanks really very useful information, hopefully the next post better okay



  26. Thanks, your article is very helpful

  27. thanks for informations


Add a comment. Registration required because trolls.